• Kimmy Pang

Relationship Squabbles

There’s always ups and downs in every relationship but it’s how you deal with it that matters

Everyone’s gonna have their bad days and it can happen to the best of us. But let’s not let it affect your relationship with your loved ones, no matter how bad it gets.


Most people believe that you have to be in a relationship with someone who shares the same interests and hobbies as you do. I think that’s a false perception of what a soulmate is. He/she should be the person who gets you.

You fell in love with your partner for a reason - with his/her traits that make them special; not another version of yourself. Yes, this might be one of the reasons causing arguments to spark but that’s why communication is so important to help you get through that. It’s not always going to work out and that’s just how life is; but if it does, the effort you’ve put into making it work after every quarrel will make your relationship stronger.

He and I compromise in several aspects of the relationship without losing ourselves. Also, just remember that the person you're with isn't a mind-reader. If you don't like something, say it but do it at a good time; not when you're on the brink of an argument.

Your differences make you who you are so embrace it


A little bit of jealousy in a relationship can be healthy. That means that your partner cares about who you’re with when they’re not around. It’s what keeps the other’s efforts going without taking your presence for granted; but too much of it makes a relationship toxic.

Your partner shouldn't be the one who controls the people you meet. Both of you need to understand the boundaries that you absolutely shouldn't cross in order to make it work. Have the respect for the person you're in a relationship with to be completely honest about everything.

It's okay to feel insecure at the start of a new relationship but you do need to grow out of it and start feeling more confident about yourself. He/she chose you for a reason and your confidence in him/her will help build the relationship. Constantly comparing yourself to someone else is the negative way to go about it - the grass will always seem greener on the other side. What you need to focus on is your own relationship; if you think there's an issue, deal with it head on together.

Cherish what's in front of you instead of wanting what others have


You need to expect personal growth in yourself and your partner through experiences, the people you meet and the goals you've achieved. Both of you need to grow together and be supportive of each other's achievements.

I understand that this can become difficult especially for long distance relationships. You'd feel that you and your partner are growing apart because of the difference in growth and he/she wouldn't understand what you're going through. That shouldn't be the case. Talk it through. It takes two to tango so both of you need to put in the effort to make it work.

Firstly, it's understanding the situation your partner is in and looking at the bigger picture. Sometimes you can't talk to him/her every day because of busy schedules, different time zones etc but that doesn't mean he/she stopped caring. Both of you need to live your lives while staying in a committed relationship. If at any point you find that you've fallen out of love with your partner and nothing you do would make it work anymore, it's time to let go.

Love is an ever-growing process

Thanks for staying till the end!

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Much love xx

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